>Growing up in Louisiana, you'd never put much thought into some of the more trivial things. 

>What your own little slice of Heaven was a small pit of Hell for her. She can't look you in the eyes and you know she won't say a word.

>The sound of rain pitter-pattering on the bedroom window would normally lull you into sleep's comforting embrace, but tonight is a little different.

There 
        was 
             a
                 flash 
                         of
                              Lightning 
and
      a
          rolling
                     of
                          T
                           h
                            u
                             n
                              d
                               e
                                r
                                 .


>You read somewhere that light travels at a speed of over six hundred million miles per hour. In that instant of bright flash through 
 the bedroom window, your mind takes a crystal clear snapshot of the room.
   >The Best Buddies certificate and PhD. that both hang proudly side by side on the whitewashed wall
      >The small revolver on the bedside table.
         >The metal crutches that lean next to the window sill.
            >The dusty-gray love of your life that clings to you like a lost child.
>Her fur feels just as soft as it looks. The hair on the top of her head is a chestnut brown
>As your try to keep her from yipping, your hands glide over her form taking in all the little details that you know so well
>Her thin shoulders, the floof on her sternum, the small mounds on her chest, and her trim waistline.

>Cassie's tremors refuse to stop as the thunderstorm continues to barge through the night. You know that tonight will most likely be a 
 sleepless one.
> You just wish that you could gaze into those mesmerizing blue eyes of hers.
> As many times as you've begged her to move away from here she adamantly refuses to leave.
>"I-I-I grew up here, silly! Why w-would I wanna...move...m-move away? This is my home."
>Her tail is curled between both of y'all's legs, and she continues to hug you as close as possible.
>The fluffy fur on the top of her head tickles your mouth as she keeps her head tucked under your chin.
>Home should not be a place where you are kept up three nights a week.

>For some reason, a warm anger washes over you. 
>You take care of her.
>You helped her study for those countless hours to help her achieve her dream of getting a Doctorate.
>You handle the taxes every April.
>You cook every meal every day: Breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
>You showed her the exciting world of motor sports and even bought tickets to that one race.
>If she would just stop being a fucking child for a single fucking second and not whine like a puppy...

>Another 
         f
          l
           a
            s
             h
              .
>Another 
         b 
          o
           o
            m
             .


>And as soon as the anger came over you, it leaves; a whole other feeling comes crashing down.
>Guilt
>It's not her fault that she was put into this disposition.
>Every other kid in school either ignored her or made her life a living nightmare
>She fought so hard all these years past her CP and Aspergers to get where she is.
>She was the one who asked to be more than friends.
>She was your first partner, and your only as far as you're concerned.
>You don't deserve her.
>The fact that she has accomplished so much on her own, despite her disabilities is a testament to her sheer strength.
>And when she needs you the most, you have such cowardly thoughts and let your feelings get the best of you.

>It's as if Cassie can feel your own inward battle, despite her being the one physically shaking.
>Her shivering stops, and she looks up from being buried onto your chest.
>Those pure pools of water pierce your very soul.
>"Anon, I love you. Th-thanks for being w-with me."
>Her head is wet, but she is not the one crying.

>"I love you, too. So very much."


          P l e a s e 
                      d o n ' t  
                                e v e r  
                                        l e t 
                                              m e 
                                                  g o